Starting Off Right: Ogling Hot Londoners
I didn’t quite make it all the way to 8PM the night before, so I was wide awake by 4AM. I managed to read and snooze until 7, and then was up and out of the hotel by 8.
I feel like I acclimated quickly to driving on the wrong side of the road (don’t @ me, it’s not “the opposite side” or whatever UK nonsense, you people are the only ones in the world to drive this way and it’s wrong (don’t @ me, I know there’s like three other places in the world that also drive on the wrong side but whatever)), so driving out of London in morning rush hour wasn’t too bad.
Except.
Except, DAMN LONDON you are full of hot pedestrians of every flavor walking to work and I almost had two ~incidents because I was rubbernecking to snatch a better look. I was marginally better about not craning my neck around to ogle people after that second near miss. Marginally.
No, Google Maps, That’s Not The Way
So, the first stop on my meandering course to Cardiff was to veer south (Cardiff is west of London for any directionally-challenged folks out there – you know who you are) and head to the Chanctonbury Ring.
Chanctonbury Ring is a prehistoric hill fort atop Chanctonbury Hill on the South Downs. – Wikipedia
Except.
Except, somehow Google Maps got that address WAY wrong and took me to Chanctonbury Game, a hunting lodge near the Ring. But not, like, “keep going two more blocks” near. More like I was pretty sure that was the Ring off in the distance but none of the roads on Google Maps looked like they would take me that direction? And in the middle of nowhere southern England, my cell service wasn’t good enough to search and re-route.
So, no majestic view of The South from atop an ancient hill fort 🙁
Portsmouth, Gateway To Commerce
Hey, I should swing down to the coast and check out Southsea Castle and the ocean! What a great idea! It’s probably definitely not a major shipping hub for the UK and not a very interesting tourist spot. And the weather is probably nice and won’t make for a lackluster beach scene.
Except.
Except it’s a huge shipping hub for the UK and not a very interesting tourist spot and the general haze over the sky means this is the most scenic shot I could get without a bunch of freighter ships clogging up the view:
Stunning, I know. Oh well, it was worth a shot!
Crumbling Castle
Okay, so back on a relatively westward route in Cardiff’s general direction, it’s time to drive through a bunch of small villages on the way to Old Wardour Castle.
And this is one of my favorite parts of driving around the UK: most of these roads are narrow one-lane roads where you have to pull over into little passing turnouts to let oncoming cars drive by you. It’s usually through arches of trees lining the roads and they’re often winding and randomly turn out into a tiny village with four buildings “downtown” before you head into pastures or whatnot.
Except.
Except, when you’ve only been in the UK for one day and your brain hasn’t totally switched to driving on the wrong side of the road, when you come back onto a two-lane road after an extended period on a one-lane road, your brain has reset and you turn onto the wrong side of the road and the oncoming car honks at you like you’re an idiot. Because. You know. You are.
Eventually one of those one-lane roads dead-ends at Old Wardour Castle, which is just this giant stone house in the middle of a field, except it’s ancient and gone to shit.
The castle was built in the 1390s and partially destroyed in 1643 and 1644 during the English Civil War. – Wikipedia
And it’s SO COOL. It’s just exactly as demolished and decrepit as you expect out of an English Castle. No turrets though. Weak.
(I promise the photos will get better as I figure out this camera…)
To Cardiff
And then I hit rush hour traffic headed into Cardiff, but Google Maps had route suggestions to get around it \o/
